Book idea- need opinions (this is the blurb)

Everybody clapped, tears streamed down my face. simon cowell was smiling, my song played. Ivy was laughing, for no reason. suddenly my phone bleeped, my song was all over instagram! Ivy smiled, i went over and slapped her face
"WHY did you do this??? only i put my videos on instagram!!!"
"well if you weren't such a baby i woldnt have to!!!!!" she retorted
"its not my fault it's my anxiety!"
"what anxie-"
the world went black

Meet demi and her family, the mega famous family! Demi the singer, Zak the teen dream movie star, and her life. Demi struggles friends, enemies, make ups and break ups, love hate and then comes her health, secret anxiety. no-one knows. all of a sudden her best friend joins her enemies, and her worst enemy is her best friend. nothing can be right anymore, can it?
(book 1 of the series)


DEDICATED TO MOLLY, WHO'S ROLE MODEL IS DEMI LOVATO, AND WHO FACES ANXIETY, ANOREXIA, SELF HARM AND FAMILY TROUBLE

what do you think???

I think it's okay but there's also grammar spelling that should be fixed.
other than that--

Ohhh lovely story! I think it's a great story, but I think some grammar changes would make it even better!<3 cc:

ignore the grammar lol xD

I really like it but I agree some of the grammar and spelling needs to be corrected ;D

I like it, but I agree with the others.
Make sure that you capitalize all of your "I's" or when a new sentence started.

omg moreee :awwwwwww:it looks interesting <33

I really like it!
Hope you decide to keep writing! xx

I really like it!
Hope you decide to keep writing! xx

This looks pretty good so far <3 Like the others said though, you need to adjust some of the grammar though in your blurb :3

If you want i can be your editor c: I'm really good language arts and I get all A's on my papers. Your story sounds really interesting, so I would love to help!

FlyAway wrote:If you want i can be your editor c: I'm really good language arts and I get all A's on my papers. Your story sounds really interesting, so I would love to help!

YOUR HIRED!!!!!
 i'll keep posting the story as i write it

Anikano1fan wrote:

FlyAway wrote:If you want i can be your editor c: I'm really good language arts and I get all A's on my papers. Your story sounds really interesting, so I would love to help!

YOUR HIRED!!!!!
 i'll keep posting the story as i write it

Yay!!